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this is from the new mysterious dinner party background. murder implications aside, i so get this name. look at this table setting. there are mysteries everywhere:

  • why are there chairs on the ends when the place settings are on the sides?
  • why do the chairs on the sides not line up with the place settings?
  • is the closest side seat having two meals?
  • what is in those glasses? this is a family-friendly website. it must be grape juice. 
  • is that seat having two grape juices too?
  • why is the grape juice in front of the plate?
  • are those two settings in the back sharing a grape juice?
  • is the rightmost grape juice sitting slightly on top of the charger plate? (that’s what it’s called i know that look it up)
  • why are all the napkins pointing in the same direction?
  • why are there so many candles and why is one side of the table hogging them all?
  • who stole the rest of the floral print on the tablecloth?
January 28 117 notes(via)

"I want the old Neopets back," they say



January 26 1,145 notesoriginal (via)





i need that royal

January 24 67 notesoriginal (via)



All her online handles are some variation of “PopPunkPrincess.”

no they dont and furthermore,


January 22 20 notesoriginal (via)



All her online handles are some variation of “PopPunkPrincess.”

no they dont and furthermore,


January 22 20 notesoriginal (via)


Never forget the Macy Gray Neopet.

January 20 47 notes(via)
What neopet plushies do you have?

Cloud Aisha

White Aisha

Electric Bruce

Red Kau

Blue Aisha

Spotted Kau

Shadow Aisha

Shadow Gelert

Halloween Aisha

Blue Cybunny


White Kougra

Starry Scorchio

(I might have even more I just need to hunt around my house)

January 15
Do u have a faerie ixi plush by chance

I do not :(

January 14 1 note

If I were to start selling some of my Neopets plushies, how many would be interested in buying? I have quite a few of the limited editions, most of them with tags still attached.

I’m currently raising money so I can go visit somebody I met on Tumblr, if that sways things a little. :3

January 14 25 notes

tyranu evavu is a piece of shit


i know some of my followers dont actively neopet (it is a verb) so im going to take a minute to explain what tyranu evavu is and why it is a stadium full of cum

tyranu evavu is a simple high-or-low card game. the game shows you a card and you guess whether the next card in the deck is higher (tyranu) or lower (evavu). guess correctly, and you keep going. guess incorrectly, and you lose.


ok so, first of all, that hardly qualifies as a game. there are like 3 scenarios:

  1. you get a low card like 2 or 3 so you pick tyranu. no shit
  2. you get a high card like A or K so you pick evavu because you are not a goddamn infant
  3. you get a card like 7 or 8 and you say “fucking” in your head and pick the one that is slightly more likely to be correct and get it wrong half the time anyway

and when you invariably get it wrong one of these gary busey neopets screams nonsense at you


what a prize. it’s like rolling a die and having sloth from the goonies yell at you for getting the wrong number. the game actually does keep track of what cards you draw so it’s, like, kind of a strategy to keep a mental tally of what cards have already appeared and how it affects the odds, but most of the time you lose two cards in, so it means diddly squat. and even if you don’t immediately shit the bed, there was probably an even number of cards taken from both ends of the scale so chanting “two queen four ace five jack two” in your head just makes your brain sound like an asshole to the rest of your organs.

now if that doesnt sound shitty enough, i didnt even get to the worst part!!! randomly, maybe like 1/4 of the time or something — i don’t know, do you think i want to play this game enough to figure out the odds — the game will switch the buttons, so “tyranu” is on the bottom and “evavu” is on top.

and That Is Bull Shit

because who the fuck wants to look at the two buttons every time when you’re just watching the cards and trying to play as quickly as possible because your brain isnt as slow as your their internet connection. it sucks a dong when you actually get into the game, thinking about the cards and odds and shit, and they reward you by fucking with neo-reality and tricking you into picking evavu on a 3 because you were focused on the cards. sometimes you can do that thing where you realize Neopets is an Asshole in midclick and then safely drag the mouse off like you just defused a bomb. but most of the time you dont know what you did wrong until one of those gross scrotums is shouting at you

also “evavu” doesn’t sound like it should equate to “lower.” it sounds like “evolve,” which any brained individual would associate with improving or becoming greater. if you wanted to pick something that sounds like it would mean “lower” or “worse” i would go with something like the name of this game. then we would have the recursively named tyranu tyranu tyranu tyranu tyranu tyranu tyranu tyranu ty

but anyway theres really only three reasons why anyone would play this game and all of those reasons are stupid:

  1. you want random events. ok, thats cool, but why the hell would you be playing this when you could be playing, like, pyramids or neoquest or dumbass dice-a-roo or huffing your own farts and spamming f5 on the neoboards
  2. you want the high-score trophy. lmao what are you thinking play literally anything else
  3. you want the avatar. as an avatar collector you are a masochist by default and your interests are irrelevant

tl;dr: uhhg uuuuuuhhhhgggg

January 08 101 notes(via)
January 08 136 notesoriginal (via)


I have waited in silence for over a year they had it coming

January 06 127 notesoriginal (via)
January 05 156 notesoriginal (via)



January 05 349 notesoriginal (via)



So, I’m at a smiling tree with arms. It is covered in shoes, barbed wire and fish that reflect the beautiful colours of that ever-present rainbow. While I’m deciding whether or not to grab a Cheery Plant with smiles, a faerie from space comes down and drops a baggy of shrooms in my lap.

If I didn’t know any better, I’d think TNT was trying to get me high. What do you think, upside down floating kitten?

January 02 66 notes(via)